What to Write in a Christmas Card: Best Festive Messages

Last updated: November 8th, 2024 Published on: August 31, 2023

Tired of generic Christmas card messages? We’ve put our card experts here at Funky HQ to work to help you smash it out of the park with your Christmas card by finding the perfect words to send love and festive wishes to your loved ones this Christmas.

So, whether you’re looking for something traditional and sentimental to show your parents or grandparents how much you appreciate them, or just looking to make your siblings or friends laugh, we’re come up with the ultimate list of the best festive messages for your Christmas card that you can steal as if they’re your own! Whether you’re writing one card or 50 cards, you’ll find a range of quotes and things to write for all types of people.

Simple but Festive Message Ideas

Keep it simple with our top picks for shorter but effective messages to write in your Christmas card to wish them an amazing festive season, perfect for writing bulk Christmas cards or when a few words can do the job of many.

    1. Wishing you a wonderful Christmas and happy holidays.
    2. Have a very merry Christmas and a happy new year!
    3. Wishing you all the best that a holiday could offer.
    4. May your Christmas season be filled with happiness and laughter!
    5. Merry Christmas and best wishes for the new year ahead.
    6. Wishing you peace, love and laughter this holiday season.
    7. Have a lovely Christmas and a fantastic new year!
    8. I hope your Christmas will be filled with lots of love and happiness… and even more presents!
    9. Happy Christmas! Merry wishes and Santa kisses!
    10. Have yourself a very merry Christmas… and an amazingly awesome new year!

Festively Funny Christmas Messages

Capture the jolly spirit of the season with brilliant funny Christmas card messages to crack them up this Christmas. Perfect for those friends or family who love a good Christmas cracker pun, or when you want to add a little something to your card to make them smile!

  1. Christmas is a good excuse to send cards to all my favourite people. Congratulations on retaining your position on my list this year.
  2. I don’t usually write Christmas cards, but when I do, I usually write the same thing in all of them. Happy Christmas!
  3. I’m writing a unique and personal message in each of my Christmas cards this year. So for you, I’d like to say: Whoever you are, Merry Christmas to my friend/family member who is really special.
  4. I would write something funny to wish you a merry Christmas, but there are some things that you just don’t joke about.
  5. May your fun be large and bills be small this year. Merry Christmas!
  6. I put so much thought into your gift that it’s now too late to get it and/or sold out. Merry Christmas anyway!
  7. Get your fat pants ready, it’s Christmas.
  8. Don we now our ugly sweaters. It’s Christmas time!
  9. Merry drunk! I’m am so Christmas!
  10. Happy Christmas. May you never be too grown-up to search the skies on Christmas eve.
  11. Have a very merry Christmas and remember Christmas calories don’t count…
  12. Happy Jesus’s birthday day!
  13. Here’s wishing your stockings are filled with something other than coal.
  14. Merry Christmas and all that other fun stuff.
  15. Santa saw your Facebook – you’re getting a dictionary this year!

Thoughtful Things to Say

Sometimes it’s just nice to cut through the clutter and just be genuine, letting them know how much they mean to you and wishing them the very best for the Christmas season. So, whether it’s family, friends, or just someone you admire, here are our favourite sincere and thoughtful messages that perfectly capture that sentiment.

  1. Here’s hoping you have a wonderful Christmas filled with moments you’ll always remember.
  2. May this festive season sparkle and shine and all of your wishes come true. I hope you feel happiness all year round. Merry Christmas!
  3. I hope you have your best Christmas yet and look forward to catching up with you soon.
  4. May your days be bright and all your Christmases be white!
  5. Here’s to the spirit of Christmas bringing joy to your heart and happiness to your home.
  6. Wishing you and your loved one’s peace, health, happiness, and prosperity in the coming New Year.
  7. May this Christmas end the present year on a cheerful note and make way for a fresh and bright New Year. Here’s wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
  8. It’s the time of year for cakes, carols, laughter, reindeer, and most importantly – love. Merry Christmas.

Rude and Offensive Christmas Ideas

Okay, enough of the soppy stuff. How about some hilariously rude and offensive Christmas card ideas that are perfect for letting them know how you really feel? Here are our top rude messages for you to write in your Christmas cards, perfect for friends or those siblings you love to bully but they know you love them really.

  1. He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, he knows if you’ve been bad or good, so you my friend – are SCREWED!
  2. There’s room for everyone on the nice list. Except for you, you’re a w***er.
  3. To do list: B̶u̶y̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶i̶d̶i̶o̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶C̶h̶r̶i̶s̶t̶m̶a̶s̶ ̶c̶a̶r̶d̶.
  4. Merry p***ed-mas!
  5. A tree died so you could have this Christmas card – I hope you’re proud of yourself.
  6. I’ve asked Santa for a big fat bank account and a slim body for you… I hope he doesn’t mix them up like he did last year!
  7. Treat yourself this year… because I sure as hell didn’t get you anything.
  8. May your bells jingle all the way, whatever that means? Anyway, Merry Christmas!

Christmas Card Messages for Your Partner

Feeling the pressure to come up with something to write in your partner’s Christmas card to balance funny, flirty, festive and heartfelt? Don’t worry, our card experts have you covered. From cute and romantic ideas for the soppy girlfriend or boyfriend to cheeky, suggestive or just funny ideas, here are our top picks for a Christmas card for your partner this year.

  1. If a fat man puts you in a bag tonight don’t worry, I told Santa I want you for Christmas.
  2. Can I please have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
  3. Meet me under the mistletoe!
  4. For me, the Christmas season starts when we get together. Looking forward to talking and catching up soon.
  5. Happy Christmas – to my favourite husband/wife.
  6. You’re the best part of Christmas to me.
  7. Here’s to a wonderful Christmas together!

What to Write for Family this Christmas

Above all, Christmas is a time to share stories and create new memories with the family, catching up over the years events. So, while you’re sat around the table ready to dig into your Christmas dinner, you can rest easy knowing that you’ve smashed it out the park with the perfect Christmas card message. From ideas for mum and dad to siblings, grandparents and more, yule find something for everyone.

  1. Wishing you and your family a very merry Christmas and a happy New Year.
  2. Merry Christmas! We’re looking forward to a new year of creating happy memories together.
  3. I couldn’t hope for more at Christmas than a holiday surrounded by the family I love.
  4. Oh what fun, Christmas season has begun! May your blessings astound you and family surround you. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
  5. Family is what Christmas is all about. So grateful for you!
  6. This time of year, I’m especially grateful for family like you.
  7. Our family is so lucky to have you in it. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas!

Christmas Quotes and Puns

Everyone loves a good festive pun (okay, not everyone but most of us!) and Christmas cards are the perfect opportunity to go all out and bring a smile to their face as they read your card. So, here are our top picks for the best Christmas quotes and puns to include in your punny Christmas card.

  1. Keep Calm and jingle all the way.
  2. Christmas is a time when everyone wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.
  3. At Christmas play and make good cheer, For Christmas comes but once a year.
  4. Christmas is Claus for celebration!
  5. “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear” – Buddy the Elf.
  6. “Merry Christmas you cotton headed ninny muggins” – Buddy the Elf.
  7. “Money’s scarce, Times are hard, Here’s your f***ing Xmas card” – Phyllis Diller.
  8. “You can tell a lot about a person by the way they handle three things: a rainy day, lost luggage and tangled Christmas tree lights” – Maya Angelou.
  9. You know you’re getting old when Santa starts looking younger.

Okay, there we go! Hopefully you can now rest easy, knowing that you’ve perfected the art of the Christmas card message. Sit back, relax and enjoy the turkey as you get to watch their faces light up as they read your card. Or if you’ve still got some Christmas preparations left to do, why not check out our full range of Christmas cards and Christmas gifts? We’ve got a huge range of personalised and novelty cards and gifts for everyone you can think of.